Constance McMillen: Intolerance in Mississippi Brings out Best and Worst in LGBT Communities
Constance McMillen: Intolerance in Mississippi Brings out
Best and Worst in LGBT Communities
posted by Olivia Mistelle Maxell on April 6, 2010
Most of us have heard the news surrounding 17-year old Constance McMillen in Mississippi.
Seems the the latest in this archaic ordeal is students of the school started a Facebook Fan Page, titled, 'Constance Quit Yer Cryin' and McMillen's school sending her an invite to a fake prom. She and her (same-sex) date, unknowingly attended while the rest of the student body went to a secret location to the 'real' prom organized by some parents. Constance stated that her fake prom was at a local country club which also happened to trick five other students, as well; two having learning disabilities.
"They had the time of their lives," McMillen said. "That's the one good thing that come out of this, [these kids] didn't have to worry about people making fun of them [at their prom]."
Sadly, not only was Constance McMillen the victim of prejudice but a few with disabilities were targets as well. It wasn't right they were singled out but the situation was reversed into a positive experience for a few which took the power away from the ones attempting to be cruel.
I think Constance McMillen has the right attitude to handle what she has so bravely taken on. I also think the situation has brought out the worst in some LGBT communities. I say 'some' because I witnessed straight and gay folks that handled themselves very well throughout this situation. Example: ELLEN!
I can understand all too well why the LGBT community is outraged. What I can't understand is some of the things I've been reading and hearing fellow adults in the gay and lesbian societies saying as a reaction to this injustice. Some have completely lowered themselves to the standards and mentality of teenagers by using insults and intolerance as a rebuttal to this situation. How is this behavior any better? How will this help the LGBT community gain any respect if none is being displayed on a personal level for themselves?
Not all of Mississippi and the south is these horrible inbred monsters with no teeth that hate anything unlike themselves. Some are kind and good-hearted people, like (once again) Ellen DeGeneres' 87-year-old Aunt Helen. The southern mentality is strong and deep-rooted. We can't expect to bring about tolerance and change by feeding the fire of hateful rhetoric. If we just stand on our soap boxes judging one another then all we are in the end are a bunch of people with different fuck preferences standing on the same slimy foundation.
Sometimes I wonder if a lot of the LGBT community is ready for change. Are some more comfortable being hated so they have something to fight for or more so against? Not everyone is against us and by acting like those individuals that truly are out to do us harm, we are losing support from the ones that aren't. I get angry too and I've been known to throw insults around on many previous occasions. I deeply feel it's warranted to stand up and have your voice heard, but I've stuck my foot in my mouth periodically that muffled my voice and all anybody heard was hate instead of my actual point.
Martin Luther King, Jr. had a very effective approach to bring about change and I think we, as people with a diversity of sexual preferences, could learn a thing or two from his disposition. I'm not saying to tolerate bigotry and prejudice, I just believe it should be fought with a certain level of intelligence and integrity--not battled with the same intolerant behavior it represents.
Posted by Olivia Mistelle Mistelle at Tuesday, April 06, 2010 10:56 AM 
Categories: News Life
Tags: olivia mistelle maxell constance mcmillen hateful rhetoric mississippi prom intolerance lgbt communities fake prom martin luther king jr ellen video
Categories: News Life
Tags: olivia mistelle maxell constance mcmillen hateful rhetoric mississippi prom intolerance lgbt communities fake prom martin luther king jr ellen video
Olivia, you are really getting me stoked. I completely agree with you. We cannot make headway acting like people who are cruel and/or intolerant. I am not saying I have never failed in this area, I have. After the whole Prop 8 thing I was very hurt, and I was angry and felt very defensive. But, you know what? I am grateful for that experience, because as a direct result of it I grew as a person. I realized that in a lot of ways I was actually behaving in the same manner as those who were "against" me. Where does this get any of us? NO WHERE. Similarly, I am thankful to George W. Bush for the smelling salts he cracked open right in front of my face. Do I want to hug someone I perceive as a war criminal? Not really, but, you know what? I think that guy has never felt truly loved or accepted, which is how he can behave in such an unloving manner. He probably needs a real, truly loving hug more than anybody...besides Dick Cheney that is.
You cannot overcome hate or anger with hate or anger. It's a vicious circle, also known as a trap. Someone must decide to go with love. Why not us?
Intolerance + intolerance breeds nothing but intolerance.
*Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King, John Lennon*
I struggle with this, but I think I would rather stand up for what I believe in peacefully and with a loving spirit. I would rather die and leave this plane than join with and add to the negative energy which seems to be trying to destroy it/us. Don't get me wrong, I don't wish to die, but I'm not afraid of it, and I guess I'm realizing that I am not willing to engage in violence for what I believe in...which is LOVE.
I grew up around violence as a very young child. I saw my mother beaten. I was sexually abused by the man that beat her. I was able to entertain how this sexual abuse could have and probably did affect me, but I never realized until after the failure of my last relationship how the violence had affected and infected me. I have come to grips with and acknowledged the "Hulk" inside of me as a result...and I have been working to smother this "Hulk" with LOVE.
Thank you for your words, and thank you for a place that I feel safe to talk about these things.
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